Sidaki

Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Rumble in the jungle

I use the term jungle here extremely loosely. This is because the location of the rumble was at a place so different from your average jungle that any self-respecting , tree-hugging jungle-lover who loves jungles will probably be offended. Phew.

However, if you take the word jungle to mean a place infested with politicians out to rip each other to shreds, then you are right on the money.

A couple of days ago, our president decided to pay a visit to Kitui ostensibly to meet the people who made his election possible. Personally, I think he was simply bored.

Anyway, Kalonzo(LLB,MP,LDP) and Ngilu(LOL,MP) were both in attendance.

Wherever two Kenyan MPs are gathered together, so shall strife be there.

Ngilu took to the podium in her usual inflammatory manner and
said in no uncertain term that the people should vote YES to the draft on the grounds that it recognises women.

Kalonzo, as is his want, took the podium to address the people,who against all common sense had decided that a good way to spend the afternoon was to listen to politicians. Anyway, he said ,not in as few words as these, that they should vote NO in the referendum. He then went a step further, in direct contrast to his diplomatic experience, and warned the president about dishonest ministers in the cabinet trying to mislead him. I assume at this point Mama rainbow had her panties in a bunch.

Remember, all this is happening in the presence of a rather bemused Mwai Kibaki, who was watching two of his cabinet ministers go at it in public. On taking the stage ,the president, in a rare show of intelligence, simply told the thoroughly entertained audience that they should vote whichever way they think is right for the country. I dare say they were expecting more tomfoolery. I know I was.

Am I the only one who wonders how the cabinet gets any work done?

What work? I hear you ask.

They must meet once in a while. What happens in those meetings?
Do they grind their teeth and stare stonily at each other until someone postpones the meeting?

In any other coalition government, differences of the magnitude we've witnessed here would lead to an election.

But not in Kenya. Nothing can be allowed to interfere with the orgy of looting going on. Nothing.

Much ado about nothing?

Nation media group, the guys who brought you the nation business directory and effectively killed the Yellow pages, have unveiled their latest project. Easy fm.

A 'new-look' radio station if you believe the hype. It must be. It certainly isn't a 'new-sound' radio station.

After four days days of forcing me to listen to some idiot snoring,
and another idiot counting down from 33,000 and lots of other idiotic nonsense in the name of building suspense, they have come up with something that has managed to sound EXACTLY the same as NationFM.

Okay, maybe not exactly.

And the slogan! EasyFM, the best Music.
After months of preparation that's all they come up with!

SleazyFM is more like it.

You tell me. Any difference?

Monday, August 29, 2005

President Moi Kibaki

Well, His former Excellency,excuse me, his excellency the former president, Moi, has finally joined the score of politicians that seem to have their minds made up about the new draft constitution.

What's amusing is that they seem to agree on something. They both say we should read it and make up our own minds. Ha!

Kibaki: Read the document and make up your own mind. You will see that you have to vote YES because it's a good document.

Moi: Read the document and make up your own mind. You will see that you have to vote NO because it's a divisive document.

The more things change, the more they remain the same.

Friday, August 26, 2005

Mission statement

This blog is in existence for one purpose, to prod the Kenyan politician's buttocks. A phrase that here means Kick their collective Ass! Anything else that is written here will be an off-shoot of that primary purpose. Thank you.

Sidaki